Current mood: mischievous
So I might have had some spare time on my hands but still not enough to publish a player guide to how to be arrested. Yes infact I spent time reading alot about how to get with the MR.RIGHT NOW kind of man which is really inspiring.
First off let me tell you what a Man should attempt to do for a lady.
Play the Body Guard Role- Yes attempt to be macho and save me ... I'm supposed to be impressed and pretend like I need your help.
Have the JUICE- Yup if you have a "BEVI" in hand girls are bound to flock to you because all the conversation lies around the drink!!
Get a PUPPY- I don't care how you acquire such a pet... just get one and make sure I see you with it. It could be your Neighbors brothers dog for all I care ... or you could be the one chucking it off the bridge in about 30 mins. All that matters is I saw you with one before hand.
Have a KID- apparently if you drag someones kid around weather its cute or not women are supposed to love it Beg,steal or just have one.
Dress up a bit-Yeah that means if you come around in your nice clothes I am going to do a double take check out the clothes and think mmm I want that.
Oh yeah my favorite get a REAL CAR- yeah... thats right just rent,steal or borrow someones AMAZING car that only costs as much as the average house. GREAT IDEA!!! Who cares if you can't drive or really even park it yourself its always good to sit in a car that looks like you stole it anyways.
Cash-Money can't buy everything.. but it can buy WOMEN!! yeah ... thats right flash your cash and women are gonna get at that.
The HONEY trick- Yeah dress up your best looking gal pal buy her dinner then while your out and about scope out the other ladies... yup making others jealous is the key. The only down fall make sure your gal pal isn't a lesbian who will take the pray and leave you lonely.
and if all else fails... how about some DRUGS. SMOKE OR COKE its all good. Yup everything short of jabbing your lady in the arm is apparently supposed to be fly these days. Who knew that having a blurry night of madness would be "FUN?"
Yes thats right once you've gotten your man to attempt any of these actions you let him know you want him by being there.
Yeah be a victim to his games... Its cool if he is a player your just there to be played apparently and who better to play you then the man offering your drugs or stealing puppies? yes ... thats right the kind of real men that are to be inspiring younger generations for years to come. So ... Yup as the lady you must move quickly ... he will know you are interested if you just automatically cross your legs towards him, apparently that says come get me like no other! Who knew? well Cosmo did of course. You could also just TOUCH his arm... yeah like you are in the 8th grade all over again just TOUCH HIM. He will get the hint. Just make sure while you are talking he isn't trying to bail on you by watching the game on T.v. or yelling for his pals. Its lame for a chick just to offer her number if the guy didn't ask. I mean I learned so much that I think I am starting to date 6 guys tomorrow.
I guess I was just a bit angry that people actually have time to publish crap like that and on top of it people pay money to read how to be a failure at actual realtionships either way I had alot of fun seeing what other people are reading and alot of fun laughing at the ideas. Some of these are most likely common and most likely used ways to get someone to date you but sadly I don't find any of them appealing to me. Maybe I will be a nun.
Remember what is Black and white,black and white, Black and White? A nun rolling down a hill. I got that part down.
Yup I work tomorrow so LETS GO GET FRIENDLY in the MARKET!!
